Love & Dating

The Dark Side Of Dating: Getting Dumped And Getting Over It

Day 5: Hey, no thanks, World.Photo by PhotoCo.

Getting dump is never, ever easy. Not even if you had a bad relationship, especially if you had long and steady one. But bad things happened and you just have to move forward, which is hard. Everyone will have to go through all or some of these phases on a way to a complete healing.

Allow yourself to feel

After a break-up. you will feel angry, hurt, betrayed, disappointed, and that is completely normal. Let yourself feel all of those emotions, don’t bury them. A lot of people try to act like they are all right, pushing those feelings away, but that is never healthy. Cry, yell, weep, do whatever you feel like, but just let it all out.

Let it go at one point

However, at one point you will have to let it all go. You were hurt, you suffered and now it is enough. Pull yourself together and find other goals. The tricky part in this phase is a wish for revenge. Try not to do that. Especially stay away from social networks and your exes profiles, because if you criticize them online, play vendetta games, at one point in the future you will regret it. Be adult about it, and focus on a next thing in your life, focus on the next phase.

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Use the emotions and channel them

Try to use those emotions and channel them into something useful. If you are athlete kind of person go to the gym, go three times a day if it is necessary, channel all that anger and sorrow in the exercise. If you are more of an intellectual kind find a new skill and master it. Work hard and don’t leave time for thinking about your ex. And it will work, you will see. It could even lead you to change your life or your career. And you will feel so good about yourself.

Make a closure

When you start to feel like you’re getting better do something, perform some small ceremony that will be your closure for that relationship. The most usual thing is to take all the things from your place that remind you of your ex and throw them away or give it to the charity. Clean your space and clean your mind, give yourself a new start. But it does not have to be this, there is a lot of other ways to make a closure.

Go to a special journey, somewhere you always wanted to go, climb a mountain, or whatever feels right for you. Finishing all these phases will make you feel lighter but not all of the emotions will perish. The best cure for pain is time no matter how tacky it sounds. Try not to rush into the next relationship, take some time to enjoy a single life. Party, travel, do something new, and when you feel ready or when you accidentally meet someone special do it all over again. One of them will be your true love.

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  • PhoenixCNA

    Ouch! Such poor spelling and incredibly awful grammar. How can we take these items seriously?

    1. “Allow yourself to feel

    After a brake-up you will feel angry, …” Yes, by all means ‘brake-up’ if you are trying to avoid a head-on collision. Try “break-up” instead of “brake-up”.

    2. “… because if you dish them online… “. Passing or throwing dishes online through the internet is impossible. How about trying “insult”, “criticize” or “be rude to”, because “diss” is slang and dish just doesn’t work here.

    4. “Finishing all this phases… ” Did you learn about ‘agreement of plural vs singular’ case between a noun and its pronoun? Try “these phases” instead.
    I am not a Nazi grammarian and I found these without even trying.

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